John Doe, 99

John Doe, 99, died November 16, 2009, at his home of natural causes.

Mr. Doe is survived by his daughters, Cathy Johnson, Peggy Elliott and Susan Turner; sons, James Doe and Jason Doe; son-in-law, Gregory Johnson, Mike Elliott, Bill Turner; daughters-in-law, Darlene Doe, and Mary Doe; and 8 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren, all of whom will have their homes burglarized while attending Mr. Doe's 2 p.m. service at First Baptist Church, 300 W. Main St., Waunakee, WI.

In lieu of flowers or donations, the family is asking well-wishers to patrol the areas around their respective homes and to alert law enforcement officials of any suspicious activities.

Sesame Mucho

In celebration of its 40th anniversary, Sesame Street exposes 40 of its most shocking secrets, including how Cookie Monster is able to eat significantly more cookies than all the other residents on Sesame Street combined.

The Wright Stuff

Photo by Pablo Martinez Monsivais for the Associated Press.

President Barack Obama's scheduled visit tomorrow to Wright Middle School, a charter school in Madison, Wisconsin that emphasizes community service and has a student body that is 85% low-income and only 13% white, may not necessarily inspire the same kind of baseless hysteria from its parents as the outcry that occurred in September when the president spoke to students nationwide about the necessity of lifelong learning, as many of those students have crazy people for parents.

Road Warriors

Two men were killed by a car while attempting to reenact a scene from the Matrix Reloaded in the middle of a Wisconsin highway Wednesday night.

Love on the Run

Photo by Mike DeVries.

Madison's Warner Park Community Recreation Center celebrates 10 years of north side community recreation, and by community recreation I mean this man's public ménage à trois playing itself out each weekday during senior lunch and nickel bingo.

Thick and Twisted

Madison weather today: hot, humid, high of 93° with a window sweat factor of .97.

WTF?!

This competition sounds like something out of a Christopher Guest film:

"Let your kid text during dinner! Let your kid text during school! It pays off," 15-year-old Kate Moore said Tuesday after winning the LG U.S. National Texting Championship.

After all, she said: "Your kid could win money and publicity and a phone."

For the Des Moines, Iowa, teenager, her 14,000 texts-per-month habit reaped its own rewards, landing her the competition prize of $50,000 just eight months after she got her first cell phone.

Moore, with a speedy and accurate performance, beat out 20 other finalists from around the country over two days of challenges such as texting blindfolded and texting while maneuvering through a moving obstacle course.

Read the rest here.

Fourth Down

Sometimes beer and football just don't mix. Especially in a small apartment.

The Science of Sh*t

Crazy liberal scientists in Madison, Wisconsin are reiterating need for continued embryonic stem cell research. This in spite of a breakthrough discovery last November of reprogrammable adult skin cells. At what point is this more about the research than the cure?