Monkey See, Monkey DUI

Here's to happiness. Here's to thieving alcoholic monkeys.

Sticking It to the Man

From the creators of the Story of Stuff, comes the next animated chapter in the oversimplification of really difficult to understand complex issues with severe environmental consequences whose proposed solutions will continue the wealth and power for people who are already wealthy and powerful starring stick figures, the Story of Cap and Trade.

New Jack Twitty

New York City gangs are playing the tweet life, because Facebook's a place they don't go. Tweet life, it`s the only life they know. Tweet life, and there`s one hundred forty parts to play. Tweet life, until you tweet your life away.

No one Ever Really Dies

Karl came into my life as a stepfather, and he left it as a father.

When the chaplain asked if anyone would like to share something about Karl, that was my first response, followed by a monologue that, though brief, rambled tearfully through more than 20 years of a very difficult relationship.

Wire, Wire Pants on Fire

Here, someone brilliant has somehow assembled a more than serviceable 10 minute clip of 100 pieces of dialogue from the Wire, which featured the sharpest, most authentic writing in the history of episodic television and is credited with the invention of swear words.

Sesame Mucho

In celebration of its 40th anniversary, Sesame Street exposes 40 of its most shocking secrets, including how Cookie Monster is able to eat significantly more cookies than all the other residents on Sesame Street combined.

The Tet Offensive

Here. Nine minutes of pretty great courtesy of Four Tet. Or if nine minutes is too long for you, Norah Jones will be over in less than three.

Casketball

Basketball star Manu Ginobili, typically known for his frenetic style of offense, here shows off his less acknowledged defensive prowess by killing a bat.

True Grid

In Florida, President Obama touts smart grid technology while wondering why the heck three men dressed as cowboys sit attentively in the front row. In Florida.

Bone, Thugs and Harmony

Ryan Gosling used to sing songs of love and devotion from the perspective of a prepubescent mouse child during his days as a Disney heartthrob. Then he became the leading actor of his generation when he gave one of the most pure performances in recent film history as Dan Dunne in the great, great Half Nelson. Now he makes rousing, spiritual, depressing, spooky, hipster blues music with friend and fellow actor Zach Shields as Dead Man's Bones.

I Wish I Was a Little Bit Antonio Banderas

Absolutely nothing this week will approach the magnificence of this spectacular commercial I found for Antonio Banderas Blue Seduction.  Upon viewing it, you will almost instantly agree that it is the single greatest piece of advertising in the history of getting people to buy things, starring the most important person ever after Jesus, Antonio Banderas.

Lights Out

People. Start buying and installing these.

Consumer misconception is at least partly to blame for the significant decline in national CFL sales. Performance issues that plagued earlier bulbs remain in the minds of many shoppers who believe believe these malfunctions still persist, despite the fact that for the most part they do not. The best way to discern a quality CFL from crap is to spot the ENERGY STAR label on its packaging, and to not buy it from IKEA.  Early pressure from government and environmental advocates to saturate store shelves with inexpensive, high efficiency, eco-friendly lighting, birthed a fair amount of bastard manufacturers who sacrificed quality control on the assembly line in favor of a fast-to-market product and hopefully higher profit margins.

He-Mona

Robert Burden paints action figures on large canvases, thereby creating the greatest art ever. Here is a timelapse of how his portrait of Battle Cat came to be. It is awesome.

Ming the Merciless

Instead of heat conducting metal fins that look like spacecraft from Flash Gordon, HydraLux LED bulbs engage a clear liquid coolant to prevent them from overheating. This form of heat control also provides 360° of small area illumination, which is great task lighting, especially if you are the prop guy in charge of gluing fishing line on miniature spacecraft for a 1930s science fiction serial whose primary special effect is a bunch of shots of steel bucket-like spacecraft flying from the left of the screen to the right of the screen. If you are that guy, then this bulb is awesome.

Zero Hour

In remembering September 11th, focus on the stalwart imagery of The World, as of 9/10/01 and listen to the puncturing sound of regret, hope and reality from the Terrence Blanchard score for 25th Hour, the brilliant Spike Lee meditation which has nothing or everything to do with September 11th.

Good Golly Mr. Smalley

Senator Al Franken is good enough and smart enough to draw the entire map of the United States.

Jiggasaw

The Blueprint 3 is ready for listening. Also, revisit the entire Jay-Z catalogue through this wildly innovative one minute cover shoot.

A Little Out of Tune

Here, that jolly sing-a-long from François Truffaut's rumpus second feature, Shoot the Piano Player, or as the French call it, Tirez sur le pianiste. Having finally seen it, and rewatching it with Criterion's commentary track on, as helpful as all Criterion commentary tracks are at simultaneously explaining exactly why the viewer should love the film while pointing out how incredibly inferior his or her IQ is compared to the scholar giving said commentary, in this case, two viewpoints, one from a man, another from a woman, which as pointed out in their commentary, is one of the film's many central themes of which you, stupid American, entirely miss while reading the subtitles, I could not recommend it more.

Batter Up

Slice three, you're out!

Fill in the Blank

Amanda Blank talks dirty, but delivers her rhymes with a Care Bear-like kindness. If there were ever a Care Bear named Club Booty, Blank would be that bear. Her debut album, I Love You, is filled with the kind of midnight to 5 AM bravado you normally expect to hear on a Peaches record, only sterile and not scary as hell. Blank's songs, like the above "Might Like You Better", call to mind pigtails and bubble gum, as you might find them used on an adult movie set by women who do not look old enough to be called women.